The Next One Changed Everything!: Patterns and Problems in Marriage and Family after a Second Child

Rebecca L. Upton, University of Michigan

This paper explores how the expectation and bearing of a second child affect work and family obligations and trajectories among married couples in the United States. While patterns of behavior change, cultural norms about having a family, and one that includes at least two children, remain salient. As women have entered the paid labor force in greater numbers over the last several decades, many find themselves grappling with the question of later childbearing and the difficulty of balancing perceived career versus fertility desires. This paper demonstrates through a combination of ethnographic and more demographic data how patterns of marriage and family building are affected by the culturally expected birth of a second child. I find that the availability of various labor policies as well as individual level social networks offer particular strategies for negotiating changes in family desires and dynamics.